No Sheroes Allowed

“Be still, and know that I am God. 

Psalm 46:10a, ESV

One of my sister-friends and I come from two different backgrounds. Our lives are different in many ways. She is a wife and mother. I am a single woman with no children. She is from the North, and I am from the South. She is an extrovert, and I am an introvert. While we are different, we share this in common. We both like to save people, or at least like to think that we can save people. 

Both of us have confessed to attracting these people who come to us with all sorts of issues, who draw us into their world, and who eventually get us to consume an exorbitant amount of time trying to help them solve their problems. After a while, we look up and realize that these people may never change. Sometimes, they just want someone to listen to them talk. Many times, they are not ready to do the work necessary to make changes, reach goals, or make their lives better. We keep helping them because we believe in our ability to do for others what they must do for themselves, put God in the middle of their storm. 

It has taken me a very long time to see that I tend to face other people’s storm for them. I am always trying to be someone’s advocate instead of letting the Holy Spirit do it. I am the first to go running towards the thing that is hurting someone instead of letting God fight the battle. I admit it, I have a shero complex. Can’t help it. I grew up watching things like Wonder Woman and Xena: Warrior Princess. Plus, I was surrounded by other black women who went about trying to save the day for others. I earned my shero complex honestly. 

I suspect that my friend and I are not alone in this. I know for sure that there are more women out there who are trying to save the day for others. There is probably at least one of our readers who is in the middle of trying to save someone right now. If so, we are not here to judge you. We want to give you permission to turn the situation and the person over to God. As hard as it may be, it will be the best decision you’ll ever make for yourself and the other person. This is not abandonment. This is about allowing God to be God and is meant to give you permission to be God’s helper. That is if God asks for your help. When in doubt, just let God be God. 

Make no mistake, things like prayer, holy listening, sharing a list of resources, and the ministry of presence are always things that we can and should do. Trying to solve people’s problems for them is not. Helping people never looks like a shero complex. It always looks like pointing the person to God. It always looks like love. 

We at Love Speaks Daily are given you permission and approval to let go and let God.

Prompt for Thought: Who am I trying to save? How can I still support that person while letting God be God in their lives?

Prayer for the Journey: God, in our attempt to be more like Christ, sometimes we try to be a savior. Remind us in those times that Jesus is our Savior and Jesus is willing to be Savior for all who come to him. Help us to point people to Christ instead of ourselves. Help us heal from our savior complex. Help us to trust you God with your creations. When we are tempted to be you God, help us to be still and let you be God. Help us to trust that you are always willing and able to be God all by yourself. In Jesus’ name. Amen.